Convivial Quotes

Are You Mad Enough to Live?

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R.E.M. sings about shiny, happy people holding hands and it’s a song that can stir me to sway back and forth with arms flowing upward, but having everyone put on a happy face and use flowery words when things are tough or uncertain isn’t what gets my ass moving to create change in my world.

I’ve got to dislike something, feel uncomfortable, lost, violated, offended, cheated, unappreciated, held back, all that good stuff in order for me to react. The straight-shooters, the ones who don’t deal well in sugar-coating a situation, who don’t mince words and “ponder on things”, the ones who go after a solution, a goal, a seemingly unrealistic dream with fierce determination are the people who speak to me, and the ones who truly get me.

This is the same breed of “response-able” people that beat writer, Jack Kerouac describes below…

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes ‘Awww!’” -Jack Kerouac

I’m reminded of one mad friend who gets mistaken for being angry when people first meet him. Funny thing is, if asked how he’s doing by the same people, he’ll say in his deep, slightly intimidating Vin Diesel-like voice, “I’m happy as shit.”

Does it make sense to compare happiness to shit? I’d say, if you choose to be content amidst apparent chaos, that’s a show of strength and wisdom, but don’t confuse it for a person who wears a permanent smile to cover up reality. Face the facts, then take your faith, courage, and will to act and get through the situation or change it altogether.

Sometimes, my husband uses the word “madness” when describing my anger and secretly, I like it because…

Life is madness…especially as a woman and I make every attempt to rebel every day.

I encourage you to do the same! Question your place. Don’t play the game. Want more…less…better, but never whatever. Speak up. Learn when to offer someone love vs. truth (psst…your honest opinion is only appreciated when it is solicited).

Put attention to your desires and all the fear that accompanies them, then…stir the pot, rock some boats, and do something about it. The Convivial Woman is all about seeing some jaws drop, aren’t you?

Speaking of the desire/fear combo, did you know I’m writing a book? The Convivial Woman, a compilation of stories and cheeky wisdom from one sensual, sublimely complex woman to another. Yes, it’s in the making, so stay tuned! And remember…

You are a masterpiece. Live…mad.

For news on The Convivial Woman book project, event news for The Convivial Supper Club (soon to be launching in my new homebase of Austin, Texas baby!), and special offerings, get your name on my one and only convivial list! And you can’t forget to join the convivial party and conversation on Facebook or follow your interests on Twitter too!

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“Up” Your Convivial Game: Part II

Decision Two: Make time to dream, to work, to write (or whatever your genius is)

There were plenty of strategic decisions which led me to decide on and make the transition from Convivial Society to The Convivial Woman. In today’s blog post, I discuss part dieux in this three-part series…

I’ll say it time and time again…it all starts with a feeling. When it’s something that you need to do, must pay attention to, if you’re not consciously doing it on your own, life will take the initiative for you and send signs, people, and even unexpected circumstances to get your attention to call you to action.

If you aren’t privy to the fact that I’ve been raising little warriors since November 2007, well, there you have it- I’m a mom. For the first year of my son’s lives, I socialized them in playgroups, did storytime and enrolled them in sing along classes, and we all made new connections and went home tired and happy. However, each night, when the moon hung high in the sky and all members of my family were sound asleep, Cheryl- the girl, the writer, the woman, the individual- would come out to play. She was always the hardest one to put to bed. I was playing creator and toiling with this idea of a Convivial Society, writing incognito for just family and close friends and when I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer, I’d surrender to sleep.

“The real secret of creativity is to go back and remember…” -Twyla Tharp

Motivation is a very personal thing and no one had me doing what I was doing at 1 in the morning- benchmarking, reading for inspiration, writing, finding my voice, preparing to build an online presence,and simply exploring new online worlds to assist me in creating my own. I had this need to (more…)

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Rebellion: hindered self-expression expressing itself. I’m thankful for all the rebels. Long live your (r)evolution!

Happy Thanksgiving Day, my friends.

Thank you for the attention and energy you offer me here at Convivial Society. I am humbled and inspired to do more!

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Words of Wisdom from America’s Sweetheart

My boyfriend keeps telling me I’ve got to own things. So, first I bought this car. And then he told me I oughta get a house. ‘Why a house?’ ‘Well, you gotta have a place to park the car.’ -Julia Roberts.

OWN YOUR LIFE.
It belongs to you first. Then whoever you wish to share it with & however you want to live it…well, that’s still a choice you own.

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Rethinking The Word: Commit

I had a Sacred Sexy session with Lisa Carmen recently and discussed the blog challenge we had embarked upon together and whether it was benefiting our efforts to be more disciplined with writing.

We came to the understanding that blogging every day for a set number of days wasn’t cutting it, wasn’t the lesson to be learned. We found comfort in knowing that it was okay not to fulfill this commitment, because this commitment was not fulfilling us.

Deep down, I felt putting words on the screen just for sake of putting words on the screen wasn’t the answer. In the words of Seth Godin, it is my duty to find words for my readers, not readers for my words. Therefore, the words I choose must come from a place that is natural, wild, convivial, and sometimes, undisciplined. And I’ll add that the timing can be unpredictable for such results.

My commitment to writing is this- to just write when I feel like it, when I am moved to do so, when I am called, or ecstatic to share something, or compelled to say something. Simply, do and write what feels right.

Many times, we get bogged down with keeping commitments that aren’t serving us, aren’t honoring us. We feel it yet we ignore it, because it’s what we’ve been conditioned to do- to ignore the gift of feeling and go with logic. Well, here’s one example of letting go of a commitment that doesn’t bring me joy, doesn’t inspire me to be fully present with my words.

In the midst of relaxing my mind with some reading, I came across Anais Nin and believe what she has to say is a great parting statement to bid farewell to my blog challenge. Enjoy…

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“One word I would banish from the dictionary is ‘escape.’ Just banish that and you’ll be fine. Because that word has been misused regarding anybody who wanted to move away from a certain spot and wanted to grow. He was an escapist. You know if you forget that word you will have a much easier time. Also, you’re in the prime, the beginning of your life; you should experiment with everything, try everything…

We have created false dichotomies; we create false ambivalences, and very painful ones sometimes- the feeling that we have to choose. But I think at one point, we finally realize, sometimes subconsciously, whether or not we are really fitted for what we try and if it’s what we want to do.

You have a right to experiment with your life. You will make mistakes. And they are right too. No, I think there was too rigid a pattern. You came out of an education and are supposed to know your vocation. Your vocation is fixed, and maybe ten years later you find you are not a teacher anymore or you’re not a painter anymore. It may happen. It has happened. I mean Gauguin decided at a certain point he wasn’t a banker anymore; he was a painter. And so he walked away from banking.

I think we have a right to change course. But society is the one that keeps demanding that we fit in and not disturb things…“

-Anais Nin

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How have you gotten better at letting go of commitments that aren’t working for you, honoring you?

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‎Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. -MLK Jr

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I write to empty my mind and to fill my heart. Writing is easy: just stare at the screen of your computer until a tear drops on your keyboard. -Paulo Coehlo

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Love thy fellow woman. She’s capable of listening to your heart’s every desire and offering you many surprises. Nurture nurture nurture.

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Open Your Heart

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What energy do you bring to the stage? Whether it’s family, friendships, professional or romantic…is it a convivial one?

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Give yourself a platform to stand on, something to call your own, a reason to stand firm and strong on your own two feet, in your own beautiful skin.

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To be…to be…never a question.

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